Put Some Pants On

It's summertime and the livin' is easy.  So easy, in fact, that many people feel the need to wear as little clothing as possible when out and about.  This is fine on the beaches of Miami or while fist pumping at the Jersey Shore but in Chicago, yes the Windy City, clothing is less optional and more necessary.  I was riding the city bus earlier this week when a little thing hopped on wearing a t-shirt and her bikini bottoms.  Several things are wrong with this scenario.  One, you are nowhere near the beach.  Two, perverted weirdos ride the bus.  Three, have you ever been on the city bus, young one?  Haz-mat suits are no match for the mutant strains of VD on the bus, so what makes you think a non-existent piece of fabric is going to protect you (and your lady bits)? 

Let me give you some advice...Your ass may be looking fine but bikini bottoms do not count as pants while riding the city bus.  Now, go see your gynecologist.  You may have some "issues" that need to be addressed.

Let me give you some advice...Trust me, you need it.

Throughout our lives we are given a lot of advice: look both ways before crossing the street;  wash your hands after using the bathroom;  just say "no"; a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down; and many, many more. But whatever happened to the everyday advice that often times flies under the radar?  I'm here to offer up some life "wisdoms" that we often neglect.




Now, let me give you some advice...If you really need guidance in your life you should (probably) stop reading this blog and contact a real professional.  I'm only here for the entertainment.